Thank you all for your patience… I hope to be back to work very soon after my fall from glory when I landed in a million pieces. I was hoping to be back sooner than later, but right now I am currently waiting for a Obamacare government official to decide whether I’m “eligible” for more pain medication. I know I’m getting a bit older these days, but I can still prove that I’m useful to society… After all, go back and read all of those great speeches I wrote about “hope and change”. I AM STILL GOOD! I want to live! I want to live!

I’ll be completely honest… Ever since I fell and crashed my glass a couple of weeks ago, I haven’t been quite the same person. Let’s just say I’ve been spending a lot of time consulting with Mr. Vicodin. And as a result, Mr. O’s poll numbers reflect my hiatus. For purposes of full-disclosure, I’m about to board a plane to spend a weekend at Promises in Malibu with Dr. Drew. I will be back in DC on Monday renewed and improved. I need to get well so I can save a presidency. Thank you all for your kind emails. The Teleprompter Kid is back in business…………

I’m still in bed recovering from my fainting spell when my teleprompter glass crashed during a speech Mr. O and I were giving. I ended up having to go back into the hospital. The good news is that I got a private room this time. In an effort to cheer myself up, I decided to re-wallpaper my hospital room with these photos…

I’m home in bed too weak to write today… Hopped up on percocets like a waffle house waitress.

Good news. I just received word that I’m able to leave the hospital today. However, due to Obamacare, I just realized the head nurse here is the same woman who helped me at DMV two weeks ago. Should I be concerned? There’s talk that I might need some reconstructive plastic surgery. I’m going to see if I can pull enough strings to get a chin implant out of the deal as well. By the way, still no one from the administration has stopped by to visit me. I think they are all protecting themselves against a possible future lawsuit. Whatever, I’m just happy to go home and see my teleprompter family. This situation is FAR from over…

Still in the hospital: Some in the media are speculating that I was high on drugs when I crashed over and blamed my fall on being some kind of teleprompter junkie. This is blatant slander!!! The last thing I remember is Rahm Emanuel giving me a glass of cherry Kool Aid, and about 10 minutes later I was on the ground shattered into a million pieces… I will not be slandered! I will not have my credibility torn apart in the press! I’ve done a lot of great things for this administration. I’ve been a good soldier. I will deal with all of this later as soon as I figure out how to use this bedpan……….. More to come